The Unburdened Leader

Leadership
The Unburdened Leader podcast, hosted by Rebecca Ching, LMFT.
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Member Since: June 14, 2023
Location: California United States

Latest Episodes

EP 137: The Summer Willis Act: From Silence to Systems Change with Summer Willis

EP 137: The Summer Willis Act: From Silence to Systems Change with Summer Willis

What does it take to lead when your story becomes the story, and the stakes are survival and justice?


When you’ve experienced relational trauma or institutional betrayal, as Judith Herman wrote in Trauma and Recovery, “The ordinary response to atrocities is to banish them from consciousness.” 


But silence protects systems, not survivors.


When we do speak up, at best we’re often told to move on, and at worst we might face violent pushback. The stress and fear from the blowback can all too easily silence us and chip away at our integrity and adaptability if we don’t do the important work to address the toll it takes.


But when we give ourselves permission to feel the overwhelm, and still take one step forward, we shift from silence into action. Sometimes that step is public and loud. Sometimes it's private and steady. All of it counts. There is no one right way to advocate for change.


My guest today did more than just share her story; she used it to create meaningful change in her home state of Texas. In this conversation, we discuss what it means to bear the weight of your trauma while advocating for others, the emotional toll of being a public face for change, and what it looks like to keep showing up, even when the system makes it difficult.


Summer Willis is an endurance athlete, advocate, and mother of two who ran 29 marathons in a year to raise awareness for sexual assault survivors. She is the namesake of the Summer Willis Act, landmark consent legislation passed in Texas. Through storytelling, extreme challenges, and her nonprofit Strength Through Strides, she empowers others to turn pain into purpose.


Content note: discussion of sexual assault


Listen to the full episode to hear:

  • The legal loophole in Texas law that ignited Summer’s drive to turn her worst experience into tangible change for millions of survivors
  • How sharing her story and raising awareness and support for the law connected Summer to a wide community of survivors and allies when she was feeling isolated
  • Why she decided to run 29 marathons before her 30th birthday while sharing her story, and how that challenge evolved into legislative advocacy
  • How being an endurance athlete helped Summer through legislative challenges and setbacks to get the Summer Willis Act passed
  • How Summer is bringing in lightness to her life after sharing her story over and over while trying to pass the bill
  • Why taking the first step and learning along the way are crucial to shaping change


Learn more about Summer Willis:


Learn more about Rebecca:


Resources:

EP 136: From Overwhelm to Enough: Leading Through Intentional Consumption with Ashlee Piper

EP 136: From Overwhelm to Enough: Leading Through Intentional Consumption with Ashlee Piper

What do you care about these days? 


Caring is the currency of leadership, but here’s the paradox: when we care too much about too many things, we can lose sight of the things that truly matter. 


So the question is: How do you direct your energy toward what you value, without becoming overwhelmed by the sheer volume of things you could care about? 


The most effective leaders are those who can connect deeply with their teams, foster trust, and create a sense of safety and belonging. They lead with empathy, not just strategy.


But perfectionism and overfunctioning can lead us to feel like we need to be everything to everyone, at the expense of our well-being and, ultimately, the quality of our leadership.


For many of us, the path to effective leadership begins with finding your enough. When you shift your lens to honoring your enough, you stay connected to your values and to the people and causes that matter most to you, without tipping into exhaustion.


My guest today offers a model of what it’s like to care deeply without losing yourself in the process, and of finding joy and community along the way. 


Ashlee Piper is a sustainability expert, commentator, and speaker whose work has been widely featured on television and in print media. She is the author of Give a Sh*t: Do Good. Live Better. Save the Planet. and No New Things: A Radically Simple 30-Day Guide to Saving Money, the Planet, and Your Sanity.


Piper has spoken at the United Nations,  SXSW, and has a popular TED talk. She is the creator of the #NoNewThings Challenge, for which she received a 2022 Silver Stevie Award for Female Innovator of the Year, and is a professor of sustainability marketing. She holds a BA from Brown University and a master’s degree from the University of Oxford. She lives in Chicago in a home that’s 98 percent secondhand and can often be found singing Seal’s “Kiss from a Rose” at any not-so-fine karaoke establishment.


Listen to the full episode to hear:

  • How #NoNewThings grew from a personal 30-day goal to attracting thousands of participants and becoming a book
  • How taking a break from consumption helped Ashlee refocus on the values and relationships that matter most
  • How marketers game our mental and physical states to sell us things, and a simple way to bring awareness to our own consumption patterns
  • Why #NoNewThings emphasizes intentionality with purchases over strictly not spending
  • Why “sustainable” is the new “natural” and tips for making more informed choices
  • How recognizing our “enough” makes space for building community, getting involved, and living our values


Learn more about Ashlee Piper:


Learn more about Rebecca:


Resources:

EP 135: Disability Joy and Persistent Leadership: Honoring Our Full Humanity with Tiffany Yu​​

EP 135: Disability Joy and Persistent Leadership: Honoring Our Full Humanity with Tiffany Yu​​

We persist for what matters most—for the people we lead, and the people we love.


But persistence can start to feel like just another weight to carry, another demand that drains us. 


And people are tired. So many of us are balancing caregiving, leadership, advocacy, a constant firehose of urgent crises, and maybe sneaking in some rest. So sure, persistence sounds good, but how do we keep going without flaming out?


We learn how to prune our proverbial gardens.


Pruning, whether a tomato plant or an out-of-control to-do list, requires focusing on the present so we can remove what no longer serves, while protecting what still has life in it. It’s persistence in action. It’s what keeps us from burning it all down and walking away or from our commitments taking over our lives.


Today’s guest offers us a masterclass in persistence. She started small. When resistance showed up, she didn’t just push through. She revisited her vision. She stayed in relationship with mentors and worked in community. And over time, she has built a global movement for disability, visibility, equity, and justice.


On today’s 35th anniversary of the Americans with Disabilities Act, Tiffany Yu shares a reminder that persistence isn’t about doing it all right away or quitting when it’s too much. It’s about staying focused, refining our vision, and staying connected to supportive people and your mission.


Tiffany Yu is the CEO and Founder of Diversability, a 3x TEDx speaker, and the author of The Anti-Ableist Manifesto: Smashing Stereotypes, Forging Change, and Building a Disability-Inclusive World. She started her career at Goldman Sachs and was named to the 2025 Forbes Accessibility 100 List. At the age of 9, Tiffany became disabled as a result of a car accident that also took the life of her father.


Listen to the full episode to hear:

  • How the seeds of Tiffany’s disability activism were sown during her time at Georgetown
  • How Tiffany’s delayed processing of her grief and trauma impacted her ability to connect with disabled joy
  • Why it matters that all of us get invested in prioritizing accessibility and inclusion for the disability community
  • Why accessibility is about more than just utility and needs to address the wholeness of people with disabilities
  • What leaders can do now to craft more accessible and inclusive spaces and events
  • The importance of community and using your influence to build bridges in the face of setbacks


Learn more about Tiffany Yu:


Learn more about Rebecca:


Resources:

EP 134: Focus, Feel, Forward: Redefining Leadership for the Long Haul with Amanda Litman

EP 134: Focus, Feel, Forward: Redefining Leadership for the Long Haul with Amanda Litman

How do we lead in the face of fear, when the stakes feel sky high and relentlessly personal?


The realities of political violence, hostility, and burnout shape how we show up. And they can chip away at your generous heart, opening the path for cynicism and doubt.


But if we can focus on what matters most, feel through our emotions–and help others do the same–and orient our gaze forward to the vision of our lives, work, and world that we want, we create an energy that cynicism can’t easily break down, even through setbacks.


We need to protect our hope and conviction that change is possible. The future is not a done deal. We have choices about how it unfolds.


In this Unburdened Leader conversation, we explore what it takes to lead with clarity, protect our capacity, and still believe that change is possible, even when everything around us tries to tell us otherwise.


Amanda Litman is the cofounder and president of Run for Something, which recruits and supports young, diverse leaders running for local office. Since 2017, they’ve launched the careers of thousands of millennials and Gen Z candidates and in the process, changed what leadership looks like in America. She’s the author of two books: When We’re In Charge: The Next Generation’s Guide to Leadership and Run for Something: A Real-Talk Guide to Fixing the System Yourself, a how-to manual for people running for office.


Before launching Run for Something, Amanda worked on multiple presidential and statewide political campaigns. She graduated from Northwestern University and lives in Brooklyn with her husband, two daughters, and their sometimes rowdy dog.


Listen to the full episode to hear:

  • How Amanda and the team at Run for Something support candidates in the face of real and present fears for their safety
  • Why Gen Z’s refusal to accept “the way things are done” is energy we need 
  • Why Amanda believes in the optimism of looking to what is possible
  • Why getting involved on the local level is a powerful counter to pessimism
  • The major disconnect of pop leadership advice with how most people encounter leadership
  • How our current moment is making leadership uniquely challenging, isolating, and exhausting
  • Why leadership isn’t about being your full self at work, but about responsible authenticity


Learn more about Amanda Litman:


Learn more about Rebecca:


Resources:

EP 133: Beyond Nostalgia: Leading Through Constant Uncertainty with Chris Hoff, LMFT

EP 133: Beyond Nostalgia: Leading Through Constant Uncertainty with Chris Hoff, LMFT

Nostalgia can be a balm. Especially when we’re in what feels like a never-ending season of upheaval and change, where every time we start to get our footing, something shifts yet again.


When we’re in the throes of change–in the liminal space, the in-between, the in-betwixt–we as human beings are neurologically wired to seek out what’s known, to reach for comfort and what feels like home. And nostalgia does that for us. It’s no wonder we look back fondly on simpler times, real or imagined.


Because nostalgia isn’t necessarily the truth. And nostalgia doesn’t always serve our growth. Connecting over “Remember when?” can too easily divide us when it becomes a rigid longing for a past that excludes and harms others or ignores painful truths.


So many of us are living and leading in the confusion, disorientation, and discomfort of these liminal spaces of change. Which is why I invited today’s guest to join me for a conversation about the pulls of nostalgia, the discomfort of liminal space, and the courage it takes to lead ourselves and others through uncertainty without losing our way.


Chris Hoff, PhD, LMFT is a narrative therapist, educator, podcaster, and founder of the California Family Institute. His work explores the intersection of psychotherapy, poststructural theory, and speculative futures. Chris is known for his ability to translate complex ideas into pragmatic tools for clients and clinicians alike. He is the host of The Radical Therapist Podcast and co-editor of An Encyclopedia of Radical Helping. Chris’s teaching, writing, and consulting center the creative, relational, and political dimensions of healing and change.


Listen to the full episode to hear:

  • How the concept of liminal space can help us normalize the push-pull of the known and the possible
  • How the process of Narrative Therapy can help people reclaim agency and possibility 
  • Why building coalitions with shared commitments is vital for making change across our differences
  • How intentional scenario planning can help people and organizations see what they need to make the best-case scenario more likely
  • How nostalgia can keep us stuck in problematic storylines about the past


Learn more about Chris Hoff, PhD, LMFT:


Learn more about Rebecca:


Resources:

EP 132: Why Most Feedback Fails (And How to Make It Actually Work) with Therese Huston, Ph.D.

EP 132: Why Most Feedback Fails (And How to Make It Actually Work) with Therese Huston, Ph.D.

When you hear the word, feedback, what comes up for you?


Most of us do not have a neutral relationship with feedback. It’s tangled up with our past experiences, workplace power dynamics, cultural expectations, and–importantly–our early relational wounds.


But at its core, feedback is a deeply relational act that has the power to help us unburden rather than re-wound.


Which is why it’s so frustrating that feedback in leadership and workplace culture is so often done without care, rendering the process performative, detached, and isolating.


Some of the constraints that can hamper authentic feedback in the workplace are necessary and protective, but it feels like we’ve lost the plot for the role and purpose of feedback, and in some cases, have abandoned it altogether.


But it is possible to navigate these complex systems intentionally and with clarity. We can make feedback a tool for accountability, care, and growth that helps leaders strengthen their self-awareness and be better advocates for their teams.


My guest today helps us unpack how leaders can cultivate a feedback culture that allows for mistakes, growth, and realignment.


Therese Huston, Ph.D., is a Cognitive Neuroscientist and Faculty Development Consultant at Seattle University. She was the founding director of the university’s Center for Excellence in Teaching and Learning and is now a consultant for its Center for Faculty Development. Her latest book Sharp: 14 Simple Ways to Improve Your Life with Brain Science is out now from Mayo Clinic Press.


Listen to the full episode to hear:

  • Why how and where feedback is delivered matters just as much for positive feedback as negative
  • Strategies for making feedback a supportive and generative dialogue
  • Why it’s critical to allow others space to process your feedback before you start problem solving
  • How starting with your authentic positive intentions can make others more receptive to feedback
  • Why it’s worth ending the conversation by checking in about their takeaways
  • How typical feedback can perpetuate disparities in the workplace, and steps leaders can take to change those dynamics
  • A tip from Therese’s new book to help manage stress and difficult conversations


Learn more about Therese Huston, Ph.D.:


Learn more about Rebecca:


Resources:

EP 131: Leadership, Accountability, and the Self: A Special Anniversary Conversation with IFS Founder Richard Schwartz

EP 131: Leadership, Accountability, and the Self: A Special Anniversary Conversation with IFS Founder Richard Schwartz

The leaders I work with want to be the kind of leaders who can handle complexity without defaulting to blame, shame, or shutting down.


But when visibility and accountability collide with unhealed relational wounding, it doesn’t matter how many books we’ve read or retreats we’ve attended; our bodies remember. And it can feel deeply uncomfortable.


Discomfort is part of the gig, though. If we let it, it moves us towards being better humans to ourselves and others. True accountability may not always lead to repair and reconnection, but it is a profoundly relational and humanizing practice led by values, justice, and grace.


But when discomfort turns to shame, accountability feels threatening rather than connective. And when we fear accountability and its discomfort, it causes more harm.


The work of unburdening is never entirely over, but as Dr. Richard Schwartz reminded me in today’s fifth anniversary conversation, the more unburdened we are, the more accountable we become. The more we desire justice. The more we want to see change. 


It’s a powerful affirmation of what’s possible when we commit to being Unburdened Leaders.


Richard Schwartz began his career as a systemic family therapist and an academic. Grounded in systems thinking, Dr. Schwartz developed Internal Family Systems (IFS) in response to clients’ descriptions of various parts within themselves. He focused on the relationships among these parts and noticed that there were systemic patterns to the way they were organized across clients. He also found that when the clients’ parts felt safe and were allowed to relax, the clients would spontaneously experience the qualities of confidence, openness, and compassion that Dr. Schwartz came to call the Self. He found that when in that state of Self, clients would know how to heal their parts.


A featured speaker for national professional organizations, Dr. Schwartz has published many books and over fifty articles about IFS.


Listen to the full episode to hear:

  • How being in Self allows us to act assertively without igniting defensiveness
  • How IFS can help us maintain our empathy and compassion without burning out
  • The challenges and risks of the rapid popularization of IFS via social media
  • Why being in Self is a continuum not a binary
  • Why Dr. Schwartz has a pep talk with his parts every day, even after decades of doing the work
  • How he’s navigating increasing media exposure while staying true to his values and IFS principles
  • How Self creates a natural desire for accountability in our inner and outer worlds


Learn more about Dr. Richard Schwartz:


Learn more about Rebecca:

EP 130: The Unburdened Leader Roundtable Sessions: Autism and Leadership with Eric Garcia and Meg Raby Klinghoffer

EP 130: The Unburdened Leader Roundtable Sessions: Autism and Leadership with Eric Garcia and Meg Raby Klinghoffer

Fear of the unfamiliar is a powerful force. 

And when it comes to autism, we don’t only have a knowledge problem, we have a courage problem. 

We’ve all seen or experienced the harm that comes with labels, bullying, and social exclusion. 

But reflexively protecting ourselves keeps us locked in a cycle of ignoring the need for real education beyond tropes or inspiration porn and keeps us from normalizing the varied needs and supports for autistics instead of perpetuating these supports as burdens or flaws.

So, how can we, as leaders, challenge ourselves to create a world where everyone is welcome—even those who don’t fit the mold? 

We invite autistic voices to the table and platform them in the spaces we live, work, and lead. And we face our fears and discomforts, without getting bogged down with perfectionism and focusing on simply doing the next right thing.

When our director of Health and Human Services is using his position to spread narratives about autistic people that are not only inaccurate, but dangerous, we have to embrace and speak up for inclusion. Inclusion isn’t always easy or efficient, but it makes us more prosperous as a community, and courage grows becomes a contagion.

Today’s conversation will help you consider how we can move past toxic, dehumanizing views about autistic people and start leading with more compassion and understanding.

Eric Garcia is the senior Washington correspondent for The Independent who authors its Inside Washington newsletter. He is also a columnist for MSNBC and the author of We're Not Broken: Changing the Autism Conversation. He previously worked at The Washington Post, The Hill, Roll Call, National Journal, and MarketWatch.

Meg Raby is an autistic female, children’s author of the My Brother Otto series, Speech Language Pathologist, writer for Scary Mommy and full time employee of the nation’s leading nonprofit in sensory inclusion, KultureCity. At any given moment, Meg is thinking about how to better love on the humans around her and how to create positive change without causing division.


Content note: Brief, non-descriptive mentions of suicide


Listen to the full episode to hear:

  • How the anti-vaccine narrative around autism pulls resources from the actual work of improving outcomes for autistic people
  • How our relational history can intersect with shame and perfectionism to make us fear a neurodivergent diagnosis
  • How a deficits-based approach limits our ability to envision what a happy, fulfilling life looks like for autistic people
  • How validating what’s often underneath fears about autism can more effectively start conversations that change minds
  • Why making spaces neurodivergent affirming is ongoing work, not a checklist


Learn more about Eric Garcia:


Learn more about Meg Raby Klinghoffer:


Learn more about Rebecca:


Resources:

EP 129: Beyond the List: Building Communities of Generosity and Mutual Care with Charles Vogl

EP 129: Beyond the List: Building Communities of Generosity and Mutual Care with Charles Vogl

We often hear the advice, “You just need to find your community.”


It sounds simple. Hopeful, even. But it can ring hollow for anyone who has tried to do it, and for those in leadership roles where they carry the additional burdens of responsibility and visibility. And it’s especially fraught advice for anyone who has experienced relational trauma.


Because true community isn’t something you stumble into. It has to be built, slowly and intentionally. And it’s often uncomfortable and messy when we’re healing from experiences where reaching for connection resulted in hurt and betrayal.


But human beings are wired for connection. We long for it. And we’re more disconnected from each other than ever.


The remedy for our loneliness is in the slow, awkward, sacred work of showing up and staying, even through discomfort and disagreement. If we lay foundations of shared dignity and respect, we can build courageously honest relationships and community in those uncomfortable spaces. 


My guest today joins me to explore the intricate journey of building a true community, one that transcends buzzwords and embraces the courage to be vulnerable and honest, to disagree, repair, and stay genuinely connected.


Charles Vogl is an adviser, speaker, and the author of three books, including the international bestseller The Art of Community.


His work is used to advise and develop leadership and programs worldwide within organizations including Google, Airbnb, LinkedIn, Twitch, Amazon, ServiceNow, Meetup.com, Wayfair and the US Army.


Charles holds an M.Div. from Yale, where he studied spiritual traditions, ethics, and business as a Jesse Ball duPont Foundation scholar.


Listen to the full episode to hear:

  • How a seemingly simple ritual of Friday dinners turned Charles’s house into a community hub
  • Why investing in community building will always require some amount of intention and effort
  • How Charles’s experiences working for social change shaped his skill for bringing people together around shared purpose and values
  • The difference between true community and what Charles calls “mirage communities”
  • What holds leaders back from creating spaces where real relationships and community can be built
  • The importance of “campfire experiences” for developing trust and admiration
  • Why we need to invite others in, not just announce our plans and hope they show up


Learn more about Charles Vogl:


Learn more about Rebecca:


Resources:

Bio of The Unburdened Leader

The Unburdened Leader podcast, hosted by Rebecca Ching, LMFT, is a show that focuses on the journey of leaders who have faced their own personal challenges, worked through them, and emerged as stronger and more impactful leaders. The podcast aims to provide insights, strategies, and inspiration to help leaders navigate their own struggles, prevent burnout, and lead with authenticity and effectiveness.

Each week, The Unburdened Leader features conversations with leaders who have overcome various obstacles and achieved personal and professional growth. These leaders share their experiences, lessons learned, and practical strategies for leading without being weighed down by stress, burnout, or isolation.

Rebecca Ching, a licensed therapist, and expert in leadership development, provides valuable guidance on redefining challenges, embracing vulnerability, and cultivating essential qualities such as courage, confidence, clarity, and compassion.

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